All of the above.

This is a song written by one Susan Werner. Not a main stream artist. I heard the song quite by chance several years ago.  Driving one of my girls to a baseball game, listening to NPR. (It does have some worth after all, public radio!)

I know this woman.  Not Werner.  The one who wrote this list.  More than one woman actually. 

It causes me great sadness to watch them sitting with the list, waiting, hoping, asking me what the problem is.  Do I know any nice single men?  

I know and I tell.  "No, that's not it Jack.  That's not the reason, I'm not like that"  

Well.  I'm standing on the mountain, and it's a clear day.  I can see, but she don't believe.

I'm makin' my list, checkin' it twice
Looking for a lover who is naughty and nice
Looking for an innocent with schoolboy charm
Looking for a kinky little French gendarme
Looking for a felon with a tattooed arm and a leather glove
And I want all of the above
All of the above, that's right

All the above and all of this too
Want me a nature boy paddlin' a canoe
A Wall Street wizard in a pinstripe vest
A doey-eyed Bowie in a little black dress
I once settled for so much less, what was I thinking of
Now I want all of the above
All of the above

All of the above is what I need
All of the aforementioned yes indeed
Feelin' pretty lonely and I must concede
That I need some love
And I want all of the above now
All of the above

Yeah I want all of the above but none of the below
None of what's to follow now no no no
An old man gettin' by on schoolboy charm
A dirty and perverted little French gendarme
A felon with a fully loaded firearm, headin' to Mexico
I want none of the below now
No no no no no no no no

None of the below, none of these please
Nature boy kissin' all the Christmas trees
A Wall Street wizard in a junk bond mess
A doey-eyed Bowie wearin' my black dress
I'm never gonna meet with any real success in that scenario
I want none of the below now

None of the below, nothin' of the kind
None of that was really what I had in mind
True true lovin' baby's hard to find but I know I know
That I want none of the below

And hey, hey
Everybody looking for a Tom Terrific
Hey hey
North Atlantic to the South Pacific
Hey hey
I've done my study and it's scientific and the numbers showed
Take none of the below
And get all of the above
Hey hey hey

All of the above and none of the below
Line up all my candidates in one long row
Line up all my candidates if anybody comes
So far it's just me twiddlin' my thumbs
So far it's just me
Livin' off crumbs

And I want some love
And I want all of the above
All of the above
All of the and only, all of the and only
All all all all all all all of the above now